2. Sigma Phi “Sig Ep” Epsilon – This second rate men’s locker room disguised as a mansion can house up to 150 fraternity brothers, just as many pairs of Timberland boots, and twice as many pairs of sweatpants. But under a graceful layer of snow, Sig Ep’s constant reminder of perceived dominance doesn’t look like so menacing…it actually looks kind of…magical.
3. This parking job – Parallel parking isn’t easy, and if you asked my dad he’d say this tire is a little too close to that curb–though something about it, shrouded in a wintry mix of ice and sleet, might make even the staunchest of parking sticklers take back any judgements.
4. Your Neighbor’s Jeep Liberty – Sure, the girl that lives upstairs, the one with whom you share a driveway, might be a loudmouth. She may, on at least a few occasions, have left her car at the end of driveway thus blocking you in (including the time you burned your arm and needed to get to the hospital). Her car may be unnecessarily big, gaudy, and harmful to the environment, but with a fresh glaze of snow, it’s just perfect.
5. Cigarettes – Which highly addictive adult snack causes bad breath, yellow teeth, heart disease, cancer, and looks enchantingly beautiful when glossed with snow? Cigarettes! Now this is a picture the Surgeon General doesn’t want you to see!
6. Euclid Ave Sidewalk – Buried under these 2 foot snow banks lies memories of an autumn passed: red solo cups, uncurbed dog feces, probably some chicken bones, but under no circumstance would we trade this frost-kissed avenue for a clear and easily maneuverable walkway. Just look at it glisten with angelic charm in the low sun.
7. Chancellor Syverud – There’s no preface necessary; we all know “Kent” and his reputation. Though, somehow, the otherwise fun-sucking, nebbish, wet blanket chancellor of ours shreds the slope in a rarely mystical form. In his wake he leaves swirls of virgin powder and taken aback students. Gnarly.
